This is a real doozy. Set in a small town in Columbia (exotic locale) in the 1970s present day, there sits a US owned cement factory (serving all of South America) owned by capitalist pigs with foul mouths and butt pinching hands.  A local revolutionary named Sanchez but clearly modeled on Che Guevara has an axe to grind against the Gringos.  There is also a spooky parish priest, lots of dancing and singing locals, a disturbingly diminutive mayor, some meddling teens, a lake, a “witch”, and a poorly cast monster who figures as a bit player.  The elements for a smash hit are there–but the product is a load of shoddy footage.  The sound and photography goes from poor to poor.  The acting is annoying.  The storyline is predictable.  But there is plenty of foul language.  Fishing for a lake monster (using a rug as bait, how original) is kinda neat.  Jim Mitchum (elder son of THE Robert Mitchum) brings his Dad’s voice and almost mirrored image–but little else.  Apparently Jim Mitchum’s movie career was even more obscure than little brother Chris (who at least shared more  screen  time with John Wayne).  This movie (also known as The Monster, among others) could not have moved Jim’s career along.  This movie would be great for MST3K.  Speaking of great, the movie has a scene where the local constable goes out on a little putt-putt motor boat to confront the giant monster (maybe a 30-40 footer) with a paddle. Yeah. Blows the mind.

This is the movie every collector should have. Sound of Music and Umbrellas of Cherbourg this is not. Reptilicus is jazzy, continental fare about a giant, mutating pre-historic monster and a cute little country astride the North Sea called Denmark. Even the real Little Mermaid makes a cameo. Added to this is a sultry love story, a mouthy yet helpful US military advisor and some Tivoli Garden singing that beats the band.

Reptilicus is mock able and lovable at the same time. Danes and a giant monster paired together is quite a novelty. Seeing white nordics run and scream in panic like their oriental cousins is reassuring, Even the monster is familiar. Reptilicus has no appreciation for Danish architecture and landmarks. And it can really ruin a day at the beach.

True to its 1950s genesis, it has all the trappings of a sappy sci-fi flick. But you ought to appreciate the Danish effort to cash in and crash in to the mega monster fetish. Enjoy it for its silliness, but also for the uniqueness of this slimy Danish delight.

The 1950s were the heyday of bad B-movies. Bride of the Monster is a classic example. The tagline says it all “Diabolical! Fiendish! Horrific!”. You can’t make this stuff up. But Edward D. Wood, Jr. did, methodically, relentlessly, ruthlessly. Despite its flaws and torrid backstory (a stolen fake octopus for starters), you can’t deny the A list actors—the sublime Tor Johnson and the original Count Bela Lugosi. There is a chief of police with a parakeet on his shoulder, a dame copping a verbal attitude at every turn, and the weirdest weather pattern to hit Southern California. This movie is best appreciated with cheap beer and Andy Capp snacks.